2011-08-10

Handling Betrayals

Betrayal is one of the most painful if not the most painful thing that one encounters in life. You have given your love, trust, services and sacrifices for him/her/them and yet they take all the good and favors that they received from you and turn against you. They slander and shame you. They distort the truth and lie to others about you. They destroy your good reputation that you have built for years.

How shall you react when you encounter such painful and shocking betrayals from those you have trusted and loved?

It is only natural that you feel angry.

It is only human that you want to strike back. (Brene Brown in her book "The Gifts of Perfection" p 44 hurting back , cruelty is never brave -- it's mostly cheap and easy, especially in today's culture)

If you are non-believers, those are commonly acceptable thing to do.
However, because you are believers, you have a inner witness that you can't do those things!(See the verses at the end of this post). While they are faithless, we have to remain faithful to our God.

How difficult is it? Who can vindicate us? Who can comfort us? What can we do?

Read Psalm 4. Here is the mind-map:


We are concern about when our honor will be restored. It seems a very long time... 1 year, 2 years, 3 years, even 10 years. Lord, when will you vindicate me?

God understand our anger. He tells us it is ok to feel angry. But we need not sin with our anger. We just need to learn to turn things over to Him and be silent and calm to let His comforting love fills our beings. We need to take time to learn and to feel His comfort. He says, "Offer me your pains, your anger as a sacrifice to me. They are righteous sacrifices because they are real and authentic and you are doing it the right way - not taking revenge into your own hands but to trust your God that will take care for you".  The Lord will shine His light and favor upon you. They are mocking you now. But the Lord God will show them.

As your faith raises with meditation in the goodness of God, you will slowing feel the joy of God coming in. It may take days, months or years. But continue in this trust.

May you lie down and sleep in peace.
May you be filled with greater joy than their grains and wines that they have stolen from you.

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Additions after receiving comments from Facebook:


Prevention of Betrayals: 
Matthew 10:16 I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.

But love and trust are vulnerable things... you open yourself up for the risk of betrayals. But true love is not possible without free-will. With free-will comes the possibility of betrayal.



Handling and Punishment for the Betrayers:

Lev 19:18 "'Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.

Deu 32:35 It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them."

1 Sam 26:10 As surely as the LORD lives," he said, "the LORD himself will strike him; either his time will come and he will die, or he will go into battle and perish.

Ps 94:1 O LORD, the God who avenges, O God who avenges, shine forth.

Pro 20:22 Do not say, "I'll pay you back for this wrong!" Wait for the LORD, and he will deliver you. and in 24:29 Do not say, "I'll do to him as he has done to me; I'll pay that man back for what he did."

Rom 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody.

Eph 4:27 and do not give the devil a foothold.

1 Thes 4:6 and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you.

Heb 10:30 For we know him who said, "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," and again, "The Lord will judge his people."

1 comment:

jade said...

God bless you for posting this. This blog has blessed me more than you'll ever know.